DON'T ARGUE WITH THE CAPTAIN
history - story

THE CAPTAIN'S FAT THERESA SHOES

by GTOs (GIRLS TOGETHER OUTRAGEOUSLY)
on permanent damage from 1969
 
liner notes:
THIS IS A SONG ABOUT A PAIR OF CRAZED SHOES CAPTAIN BEEFHEART WEARS

a brown felt top hat wrapped with a bow
yellow wrap around girl-watchers that never show
his blue eyes, his blue eyes
what a fantastic disguise
he's so grand and fantastic, so wonderful

the t of his t-strap stands for tippie-toes
his tippie-toes fit him to a t
oh c.b. do a tap-dance for me
with your big fat tippie-toe theresa shoes

a jacket with virgin, virgin button holes
reaching for experienced buttons
thin striped chords that circle his
porcelain ankles funneling down to
the captain's fat theresa shoes

the t of his t-strap stands for tippie-toes
his tippie-toes fit him to a t
oh c.b. do a tap-dance for me
with your big fat tippie-toe theresa shoes

his blue eyes, his blue eyes
what a fantastic disguise
he's so gay and fantastic, so wonderful
the elevated plastic heels
that wish they could look like wood
that wish they could look like wood
shuffle on the floor and do so very much more
than other shoes, than other shoes
than other shoes ever could

the t of his t-strap stands for tippie-toes
his tippie-toes fit him to a t
oh c.b. do a tap dance for me

*

captain beefheart's blue suede shoes
(1968 rome pop festival)

*

NOTE FOR BIG DUMMIES:
second half 1968 through first half 1969 don van vliet - the magic band had to stay at home, rehearsing 'trout mask replica' - lived in a neighbourhood in los angeles where he was kind of admitted to a weird 'scene' that hung around with frank zappa, the infamous local alternate music boss. when the latter needed some freaks for his 'straight' record label, he invented the GIRLS TOGETHER OUTRAGEOUSLY - in short: g.t.o.'s - a group of happily disturbed groupies.
now, the captain was born with a fondness for extravagant shoes, and the girls had noticed that habit.... but you shouldn't read about this song, you should try to hear it!

it's unknown whether don responded to this song by bursting out in a tap dance

*

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captain beefheart electricity
as felt by teejo